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5:30 a.m. and your alarm goes off. You open one eye and quietly, so your partner can’t hear, you sigh. Regret stands by your bedside, the first thing you see this morning, every morning, because you no longer love your job. It is an obligation so that your family can eat, be shod, be sheltered. You wish there was someone you could tell, someone you could talk to honestly.

6:00 a.m. and his alarm goes off. You watch him rise, head for the shower, turn on the radio so he can jazz up the start of his day, and you wonder why it isn’t working, when you turned cold to his touch, could it really all go back to those parts of childhood you work at not remembering. You have to do something soon because he will not be oblivious forever. You wish there was someone you could tell, someone you could talk to honestly.

6:30 a.m. and you promised yourself you would paint before you did anything else today. You roll over instead, something about the blank canvas you placed in your bedroom threatening, a challenge. At 6:35 the phone rings. It is your creativity partner; she is asking if you are up and moving yet. You lie because she is already at her writing desk, pen in hand. You want this more than anything you tell yourself, you tell your friends, but something about that blank canvas, the paints all laid out, stops you every time. You wish there was someone you could tell the truth, someone you could talk to honestly.

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